Wednesday, February 27, 2008
- pandora's ..misery. -
What's in the box? Maybe I'll tell you, maybe I wont. But I will tell you one thing. And that it was lugged around the city the whole day today. And what a hot day it was!!
Anyway, as the day went on, it became fuller. Filled with many wonderous things.
I'll tell you a secret. *It's Yeeyang's present.*
I think it was by far the most fun present to buy..
-{ missing you 2/27/2008 07:57:00 pm }-
Friday, February 22, 2008
- downside up -
OMG. Blogger is being gay and wont let me upload pictures. Just when I feel like doing the uploading!!!!
Comments from last blog made me realise that regard the changes that have been made in my life, I am still so pessimistic. It seems inevitable. Having something you want, only makes you scared of losing it. Dreaming of having it, always seemed the safer option. It used to be the only option I was used to.
Now things are becoming reality and it scares to to think how I could live the way I used to. Dreaming. This is why I'm so pessimistic, it's like my safeguard to when I fall down.
But I guess it doesn't really stop the pain when it hurts.
I am happy and I want to stay happy. I have the simple things in life like good friends and family and it's more than I can ask for. I need to wake up everyday with that on my mind and I think it could get me through the day without a negative thought in mind.
It's hard to blog these days, I suddenly don't know what to write. Not that I wrote anything good before anyway. But for the sake of the few readers that expect me to write, I will write. And think of you.
You guys are the protagonists of my life (^^)Y
Comments from last blog made me realise that regard the changes that have been made in my life, I am still so pessimistic. It seems inevitable. Having something you want, only makes you scared of losing it. Dreaming of having it, always seemed the safer option. It used to be the only option I was used to.
Now things are becoming reality and it scares to to think how I could live the way I used to. Dreaming. This is why I'm so pessimistic, it's like my safeguard to when I fall down.
But I guess it doesn't really stop the pain when it hurts.
I am happy and I want to stay happy. I have the simple things in life like good friends and family and it's more than I can ask for. I need to wake up everyday with that on my mind and I think it could get me through the day without a negative thought in mind.
It's hard to blog these days, I suddenly don't know what to write. Not that I wrote anything good before anyway. But for the sake of the few readers that expect me to write, I will write. And think of you.
You guys are the protagonists of my life (^^)Y
-{ missing you 2/22/2008 12:16:00 pm }-
Sunday, February 17, 2008
- all fall down -
Why the fuck does everybody know relationships better than I do? Is it because I haven't been in a proper one?
How come it's so hard to please everyone? Why must life be made of gives and takes? Why is life totally unfair sometimes?
What has this life of mine become? I'm am doing what I vowed not to do, yet all I can see is everyone slipping away from me. And I can't even manage my relationship properly. I feel if I let go of it, then I will have lost everything, everyone.
My rock will not be made of sand and crumble away so easily. I want to make things work, I want to make everyone happy again. But at the moment, I just need to cry. These tears will fall down my face so I can find another happy day again.
How come it's so hard to please everyone? Why must life be made of gives and takes? Why is life totally unfair sometimes?
What has this life of mine become? I'm am doing what I vowed not to do, yet all I can see is everyone slipping away from me. And I can't even manage my relationship properly. I feel if I let go of it, then I will have lost everything, everyone.
My rock will not be made of sand and crumble away so easily. I want to make things work, I want to make everyone happy again. But at the moment, I just need to cry. These tears will fall down my face so I can find another happy day again.
-{ missing you 2/17/2008 12:49:00 pm }-
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
- it's like a puff of air. -
Was it a *poof* or a mushroom bomb explosion, I do not know. I know it went off, I just don't know where. But I'm not scared. Because I am Lisa. Some things don't scare me. This doesn't.
What scares me is seclusion. Being shut out from understanding. It makes me feel out of breath. It makes me feel so much nothingness.
But how can I feel so secluded and lonely when I have all the people who love me around me? Is it so hard to be happy?
This wasn't meant to be a sad post. But the day ended sad. I have so much I need to do, like blog more and put my pictures up already. But all I do is work. My free time is spent with the one person I need to be with right now.
What scares me is seclusion. Being shut out from understanding. It makes me feel out of breath. It makes me feel so much nothingness.
But how can I feel so secluded and lonely when I have all the people who love me around me? Is it so hard to be happy?
This wasn't meant to be a sad post. But the day ended sad. I have so much I need to do, like blog more and put my pictures up already. But all I do is work. My free time is spent with the one person I need to be with right now.
-{ missing you 2/12/2008 03:02:00 pm }-